Hey there,

What do you see when you look at your circle of friends? Are they people who are mostly in the same life stage as you? Are you all studying in the same school or course, or just starting work?

If you find great comfort in navigating life with friends who are in the same boat, you’re not alone. It’s completely natural to want pals who can relate to what you’re going through. Our shared challenges bring us closer, after all!

Branch Out — and Up & Down!

You’ve heard the phrase ‘Age is just a number’, but how does that play out in your own life? We’re here to ask you to consider forming meaningful friendships with people who are outside of your age bracket.

This could be anyone from the older colleague on your team who’s a young parent to the secondary school junior you’ve reconnected with on IG. It could even be the brisk walking aunty you always say “hi” to on evening runs around your neighbourhood! All of these people are living interesting lives that are as complex as your own, and there’s bound to be value in getting to know them.

If you take the time to dig a little deeper, you might find that besides being a new dad, that colleague spends his free time playing the same RPG games that you do. You could hop online to game together, talk about things outside of work and discover a cool new friend!

Maybe that neighbourhood aunty has the best nutritious recipes that can help you meet your fitness goals. Why not strike up a convo the next time you see her and ask her more about her health journey? For all you know, she may appreciate the chance to talk to someone new — and you could gain a new friendly face in the neighbourhood.

All it takes is a little time, effort and thoughtfulness to reach out and get to know someone a little better. You’ll never know what you might find!

What’s the Point?

You might be thinking, “Sure, I could strike up more conversations with people outside of my age group — but why bother?”. Being different ages means that you’ve had different life experiences, been introduced to different ideas and may even approach challenges in unique ways. Check out the points below for some ideas on for how these differences can bring huge value to your own life!

Friendships with older people could look like:

1) Firsthand advice on work, relationships and more from people who have been there and done that.

2) Wise perspectives on life, taken from lived experience and lessons learned along the way.

3) Foresight and care for your future from people who have a vested interest in your wellbeing.

4) Parental figures & role models who aren’t actually your parents. The people who raised you bring wise perspective too, but it’s natural to hesitate about opening up to your parents or feeling like their advice is nagging. Advice hits different when it’s coming from someone who doesn’t have the same kind of attachment to you that your parents do.

5) Filling a gap in your social circles. You might regularly interact with people like your parents who are 20-30 years older than you, but what about the ages in-between? Friends who are 5, 10 or 15 years older than you can bring a unique POV.

Friendships with Younger People Could Look Like:

1) New ideas from a generation that sees the world in a different way.

2) Keeping up with trends and tech. Who better to keep you up-to-date than the people who make the trends in the first place?

3) Excitement, energy and courage to try new things. Feel like you’ve lost the spontaneity you had in your youth? Younger friends can give you the push you need to take life a little less seriously again!

4) A renewed link to hobbies and interest you’ve given up. Stopped crocheting or playing football when you started work because you just didn’t have the time or energy? Younger friends who still actively pursue these activities could inspire you to get back in the game.

5) Insight into what’s different now compared to when you were growing up. Times change, and we should change with them!

“I don’t know… I don’t think it’s for me.”

That's alright :) We get that the idea of having fully-fledged friendships with younger or older people might still seem strange — especially if it’s not something you’ve experienced before! Maybe mentorship is the way to go?

Consider: Mentoring!

Mentorship can be a great way to diversify your networks. You get to form a relationship that adds value in a different way! You can choose to mentor someone younger than you, be mentored by someone more senior or both. You can mentor/be mentored in any area of life too: career, faith, relationships and more!

If you’re looking for a mentor, a great place to start is to take stock of the people around you and figure out whose life, outlook or career path looks the most aspirational or relatable to you. Take the leap and ask them if they’d be willing to meet with you, check in and advise you on your journey. Not sure if a mentor is what you need? Here are just some of the benefits!

Being mentored can:

1) Be a resource to learn from someone’s real-life experience

2) Connect you to opportunities for growth and networking 

3) Show you possibilities for your own future

4) Bring clarity to your decisions

5) Give you someone who is committed to supporting you

Similarly, if you see potential in a junior or younger colleague and you think you have something to offer them, ask if they’d be interested in a mentoring relationship! If there’s no one that stands out, you could try broadcasting your mentoring availability on social media (LinkedIn is particularly good for this). In time, the right person will find you. Remember: it takes two willing and intentional parties for mentorship to flourish. A good fit is important and worth taking the time to find! Being a mentor isn’t just about giving, either. Here are just a few of the things you could gain!

Being a Mentor can:

1) Give you the chance to share from your experiences

2) Let you practise empathy, leadership and communication

3) Challenge you to expand your perspective

4) Allow you to give back to your community

5) Contribute to your self-fulfilment as you help others succeed

Interested in widening your network through friendships or mentoring, but don’t know anyone IRL who might fit the bill? One of Friendzone’s intergen events might be for you! Stay up to date with our events on Eventbrite or on our socials ‚ there’s something for everyone :)

Whether it’s diverse friendships or mentoring that you consider, we hope this blog had given you a new perspective on what your social circles could look like! There’s more than one way to do friendships, and like we always say: community is yours to create.