Friends in Love
Happy Valentine’s Day!
Whether you’re married, single or something in-between, there’s no escaping the Season of love. Pink and red hearts and overpriced chocolates remind you that there’s one thing on everyone’s minds!
This season hits different for everyone. Some of us avoid the cringey vibes at all costs. Others love the opportunity to celebrate the love (romantic or otherwise!) that they have in their lives. If you’re actively looking for a relationship, your thoughts may be on finding ‘the one’.
No matter what, there’s something we often overlook at this time of year. What role do our friendships play - in finding, keeping and celebrating love? Read on to find out!
Friends Know You Best
We may think of our family members or significant others as knowing us best, but friends are the family we choose. They often know us better than most people - including ourselves! When we’re truly comfortable around our friends, they get to see us at our most natural state in a variety of situations. Their perspective is an invaluable resource, especially for insight into your love life!
Ask Them Anything
Our friends are often our go-tos for advice on various topics, and dating and romance are no exceptions.
Involving friends from the beginning brings perspective and wisdom, especially when you’re in the throes of new love and may not be thinking as clearly.
Remember though - boundaries are important! Keep in mind that your friends (ideally) are coming from a place of wanting the best for you. If you feel that they are overstepping, be clear with your boundaries and explain your views to them. There’s always room for healthy discussion!
A Litmus Test
When seeking your friends’ opinions on your dating life, how you react to their advice is often a good indicator of where you’re at with your potential partner.
If many of your friends are expressing concern about the person you’re dating, take them seriously. It’s important to make sure that you’re willing to hear honest opinions! If you aren’t, or you find yourself getting defensive, that might be a red flag about your relationship that’s worth examining.
Generally speaking, asking yourself “Will my friends like them?” is probably a good litmus test for any new relationship! After all, your long-term partner is going to have to spend lots of time around your friends - and vice-versa. Similarly, if you find it hard to get along with your partner’s friends, it might be worth thinking about whether the relationship is right for you. After all, the people we surround ourselves with are a reflection of us!
Playing Matchmaker
Single and looking for love?
Dating apps are wildly popular at the moment, but they might not be for everyone! There are more options for dating IRL now - check out Kopidate or Dating for Good! One of the best options that has stood the test of time, however, is getting your friends to set you up.
Your friends know you best, and they’ll probably have a good idea of what you’re looking for in a partner! Bonus: you won’t have to worry as much about your future bf/gf getting along with your friends.
Even though this is a great option, it’s important to be aware that if things work out, your friendship dynamics may have to change a little. Friends partnering up is often a joyous thing, but may take a but of getting used to - that’s okay!
Friendship on Fire
As we've all learned from Disney movies growing up, many of the best relationships start out as friendships! 🔥 Getting to know someone as a friend first is generally a good way to see how things might pan out. You learn about one another in a more relaxed setting, there’s less pressure - and it builds a good foundation for a romantic relationship.
However, remember that not all friendships work as relationships, and vice-versa! Before you take the plunge and work towards something more, try to be as certain as you can about one another. Talk openly and honestly about your feelings with one another. If you’re on the same page, that’s great! If you’re not, you could always go back to enjoying your friendship.
Single and Lonely?
Still waiting for ‘the one’, and feeling the sting a little more this time of year? That’s okay. Singlehood can be an enjoyable season of life, but when your goal is to find a partner, the journey can be tough. In the meantime, though - your friends are always there for you. Companionship is more than just romantic! Platonic friendships can bring lots of satisfaction, closeness and connection, reminding us that we’re not alone.
If the Valentine’s Day season is hard for you, reach out to your friends and let them know how you’re feeling. You could even organise a day out with your closest pals before or after V Day (Galentine’s, anyone?) to celebrate the people who are near and dear to you!
“A faithful friend is a sure shelter, whoever finds one has found a rare treasure”
In the journey of life and love, friends are a gifts to be treasured. It’s always worth taking the time to show your nearest and dearest that you care! 💖